Saturday, July 01, 2006

DOMA...Defense of Marriage Act. They should just call it the LNLQMA (Let's Not Let Queers Marry Act). At least then, there would be some truth in advertising. To be honest, the name 'Defense of Marriage Act" perplexes me. Is heterosexual marriage in such a fragile state that it needs defending? If it is, it isn't for lack of trying. I know people who have been married three, four, even five times. It seems like they should have gotten it down pat by the third or fourth time. Maybe its because so many heterosexual people have taken marriage for granted, broken their vows, ignored the 'til death do we part' clause, and made a mockery of marriage by marrying in haste or in a drunken stupor, only to get it annulled 24 hours later? Do they feel threatened by us because we take the rite of marriage so seriously that we face contempt of court, public outcry and ridicule just trying to get the same rights that they have, yet do not appreciate? When my wife and I got married, (we had a commitment ceremony in our UU church), we were asked, "Why are you doing this? It isn't even legal." We responded that our relationship, our commitment to each other was too important NOT to do it. To publicly proclaim our love and devotion deserved a ceremony. We knew that we would still have to legally acquire the simple protections that heterosexual couples automatically receive upon saying "I do". But our love deserved this ceremony, whether we received these same protections or not. If/when marriage for homosexuals becomes legal in our state/country, we'll be first in line. But until then, we consider ourselves married, legally or not.
In the meantime, in keeping with our most important goal in life (i.e. the destruction of heterosexual marriage), we would like to offer these three compelling reasons to destroy heterosexual marriage: 1. It would put an end to the men who approach lesbians in the gay bars and ask "do you wanna come 'party' with me and the wife?" 2. Women would not have to deal with the problem of 'male empty container syndrome' in their refrigerators and pantries.(Hey, we're just trying to help our heterosexual sisters out!) 3. It would mean that we wouldn't have to listen to straight women complain about their husbands all day long. (People think that lesbians do not like men, but if you listen to straight women fuss about their husbands, you'll know who REALLY dislikes them!) Well, back to our alternative lifestyle...I have to get a load of clothes out of the dryer! More later!


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